Kinky Friedman

I encountered the first quote below (way below) tonight in the forward to a book, and was reminded of how much I like Kinky Friedman. I think the first time I heard of him was in the late 1970s when I was living in Topeka. He and his band, "Kinky Friedman and the Texas Jewboys" were a fixture at the Lone Star Cafe in NYC. I didn't know anything about his music, but who couldn't love a guy who fronted a band with a name like that?

Then he surfaced again in my life as an author of humorous mystery novels in which the main character was a Texan musician in NYC named Kinky Friedman, living in the Village.

Greenwich Killing Time, A Case of Lone Star, When the Cat's Away, The Prisoner of Vandam Street, Musical Chairs and The Mile High Club are a few of the titles I recommend that you go to Amazon and buy.

I think I've read all of the mysteries listed above, but I confess that I haven't read any of the other books listed below, but how can you not be drawn to titles like this? And this is just a sample. The guy is prolific.

Kinky Friedman's Guide to Texas Etiquette: Or How to Get to Heaven or Hell Without Going Through Dallas-Fort Worth

Elvis, Jesus and Coca-Cola

'Scuse Me While I Whip This Out : Reflections on Country Singers, Presidents, and Other Troublemakers

Armadillos & Old Lace

 Drinker With A Writing Problem

 

Kill Two Birds & Get Stoned

 You Can Lead a Politician to Water, But You Can't Make Him Think: Ten Commandments for Texas Politics

 The Love Song of J. Edgar Hoover, A Novel

 Then he surfaced again as a candidate for governor of Texas in 2006. Many of the quotes below appear to be from that period.  (He finished fourth in a six-man race with 12.6% of the vote.)

And now, those promised quotes:

It's all very well going around thinking you're a cowboy, until you run into someone who thinks he's an Indian.

I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.

Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive.

A happy childhood... is the worst possible preparation for life.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

I see an issue I like, and I support it.

Musicians can run this state better than politicians. We won't get a lot done in the mornings, but we'll work late and be honest.

I've always said money may buy you a fine dog, but only love can make it wag its tail.

May the God of your choice bless and keep you. I respect Him as long as He does not circumcise me anymore.

And I think musicians can better run this state than politicians. And, hell, beauticians can better run the state than politicians.

Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never had a home, we never married and we traveled around the countryside irritating people.

We've got to clear some of the room out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like the pedophiles and the politicians.

Yes, I'm a Judeo-Christian. Jesus and Moses are in my heart, and... both of them were independents, by the way.

The Democrats and Republicans are the same guy admiring themself in the mirror.

These days, there are many people around the world who listen to the songs that made me infamous and read the books that made me respectable.

How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design?

Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.

You have to pretend that your life is a financial pleasure even when your autographs are bouncing.

I even went so far as to become a Southern Baptist for a while, until I realized that they didn't hold 'em under long enough.

If Willie Nelson had been Rosa Parks, there never would have been a civil rights movement in this country, because he refuses to leave the back of the bus.

I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes.

When I'm governor... I'll be the first governor with a listed telephone number.

The teachers are getting screwed, blued, and tattooed by the system.

We're first on executions. We're 49th in funding public education. We're in a race with Mississippi for the bottom, and we're winning.

Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get.

I'll sign anything except bad legislation.

I'll keep us out of war with Oklahoma!

I have a better head of hair than Rick Perry; it's just not in a place I can show you.

I'm too young for Medicare and too old for women to care.

I'll tell you right now. I'm for prayer in school.

I don't remember the first half of my life. All I say is a happy childhood is the worst possible preparation for life.

The only currency I value is the coin of the spirit. That's very important in my life.

We were a country band with a social conscience.

William Bennett is my patron saint, one of them. Redd Foxx is another.

No, nothing has changed in my life at all, and nothing would change if I had millions.

The first thing I'll do if elected is demand a recount.   (NOTE: I think he stole this from William F. Buckley)

 

I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow.

Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.

The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.'